My partner in crime and I have been doing the same “dance” for about 4 years now. And I still have no idea what the hell is going on.
Let me explain…
When it comes to letting me know it’s time for walkies, my dog does all the usual dog things… standing by the door, letting out a little bark, calling the RSPCA to alert them to potential abuse…
So far, pretty normal.
Eventually, I pick up on his subtle hints (his emails can be particularly cruel) and get up to grab his lead and harness to take him out.
This is when the dance begins…
I get out the lead… he’s fine.
Bring out the harness… and he walks away, turns around, and comes back.
Every sodding time.
It’s not a frightened as hell, “you ain’t getting me in THAT” reaction.
He just looks at it, turns around, walks about two metres, then comes back and steps in it without any bother.
Four years we’ve been doing the “Harness Hotstep” and I’ve still no idea what the hell is going on inside his head.
“Is he hoping it’ll have vanished when he turns around again?”
“Does he like to ‘walk in’ to the harness from a certain angle?”
“Is he stealing an idea from Elvis and using the walk to get himself psyched up for our morning amble?”
I have no idea.
And, even though it’s a tiny thing… I REALLY want to know what’s going on!
I don’t like mysteries and unanswered cliffhangers, even when it’s stupid, tiny things like this.
As a business owner, there are lots of times you’re left scratching your head, wondering what the heck is going on.
None are more frustrating than the mystery of “why the hell is no one buying my thing?”
You have a great offer… and a killer sales page, but sales aren’t coming in.
Like me and my dog, you’re left scratching your head wondering:
“What’s going on?”
“Is it my sales page?”
“Is the offer not quite ‘there’ yet?”
“Should I NOT have based the copy entirely on Justin Bieber lyrics?”
Just like a good dog trainer could probably tell me in five seconds exactly what’s going on with my dog, I can do the same for your offer and copy.
I can reveal the mystery once and for all about why customers aren’t buying as much as you’d like.
I can show you what’s not working, but more than that…
I’ll show you how to make it better.
I’ve opened up a few spaces for “Coffee Consults” where, for the “criminally-low” price of £20, I’ll look through your copy and give you my thoughts on how to make it work harder and generate more sales.
Not only will I annotate your sales page, so you’ve got a lovely PDF filled with notes, but I’ll also shoot you a video, talking you through my ideas, so they’re even easier to understand.
Bottom line: grab one of my “Coffee Consult”s and you’ll no longer feel frustrated, wondering what the hell is going on.
All you have to do is send me your words and I’ll show you how to make ‘em awesome.
Have a good ‘un,
P.S. If you’ve ever asked a copywriter to quote for a critique, you’ll realise how much of a screaming bargain this is.