This is a hard email to write.
Not technically. I’m not typing using a Chinese keyboard while unicycling or anything.
I just hate talking about myself.
But there’s something I should remind you about.
Yesterday, I gave you a link to the “Quick ‘n Easy Copy Critiques” I’m doing for a tenner.
Thing is… I can help you with more than that.
Remember – this time last year I was a full-time magician.
In fact, THIS weekend last year I was at the Blackpool Magic Convention and I was first hearing about COVID, as dealers were doing fistbumps and looking like they were plotting something evil, as they constantly rubbed their hands with alcohol.
In less than a year, I not only pivoted, I got on the radar of three (yep, THREE!) “big kahuna” clients.
Even though all three were looking for a copywriter to join the team, let’s face it, as someone with NO copywriting experience…
… I wasn’t even close to being among the top applicants.
And yet, when I applied…
“Dude, are you free for a project this week? No problem if not. Either way, I wanna work with you…”
“As soon as I saw your application, I sent it to the boss with a note – ‘You gotta see this guy…’”
“I want that guy writing my emails…”
Maybe you don’t have a sales page or email sequence that could use a fresh set of eyeballs, but…
… maybe there’s a dream client that you’re desperately wanting to land…
Want me to help you with that?
Send me what you got and I’ll help make it better.
Like I say, this is a hard email for me to write.
I’m not good with compliments, so let’s even things out a little…
You’ve heard three positive quotes, so here are three times I was a complete and utter tool:
1. When I was young, I pondered the question “I wonder how long I can stand next to this electric fire?”.
Unfortunately, I chose to find out while wearing my school pants which went up in flames faster than a petrol soaked rag that Boris Yelstin and Oliver Reed had pissed on.
2. I was performing magic at a swanky, high-end gig, and everything was going well until I got to the top table, when one of the ladies dropped a napkin and, as I did the gentlemanly thing to bend over to pick it up…
… I did a rather ungentlemanly thing and let rip with the deepest, loudest fart I’ve ever summoned.
(I didn’t get rebooked)
Or, how about…
3. When I was a social worker, working in child protection, and innocently asked a 7-year-old boy, “How do you know mummy loves daddy?” and he replied, “because every Friday they go into their bedroom, lock the door and make this noise…”
… and I had to crush my foot under the chair leg to stop me from corpsing.
4. Or about that time I met Britney Spears at a celeb do and she slipped me a…
… wait a second, you’ve already had your three.
Let’s wind this up – Valentine’s day is fast approaching.
Is there a special client you want to woo?
If there is, and you think I can help…
Have an awesome weekend,