Inbox
“We now go live… to you, reacting to me appearing in your inbox on a Saturday…”

(I’m the hairy one BTW)
Before you hit the trashcan icon, so you can get back to watching TikTok on the toilet perusing The Economist, you should know…
… this isn’t the usual email.
No deep and profound marketing lesson (“wait… is there ever?”), or pitch for a Copy Consult (see – no link), as I try to convince you to spend your hard-earned Shekels with me.
After shooting my video this week, talking about making your customers jump through hoops (and rectal exams), I realised that creating a GOOGLE DRIVE OF AWESOMENESS!!!! for you isn’t enough.
There’s more I could do to make your life easier.
This email is the first step.
So, rather than you rummaging around in the GOOGLE DRIVE OF AWESOMENESS!!!!, digging for the good stuff, like it’s the Blockbuster video bargain bin on a Friday night…
… I thought I’d help you out with a short guide to what’s in the GDOA!!!! – and how it can help you.
Ready?
ALL THE EMAILS – Know you should be emailing your list, but don’t know where to start?
Hate doing battle with writer’s block as the flashing cursor of doom sits there, mocking you?
“All the emails” is here to help. Click on it and you’ll find 61 email prompts, waiting for you to send to your tribe, to help keep them happy and engaged.
Think about this… if you only send one email a week – that’s over a year’s worth of emails!
If you finally wanna shake the niggle of knowing you should be emailing your list…
… “All the emails” is the best place to start.
THE SNIPER APPROACH – What do Chris Orzechowski, The No Pants Project, and Jeff Walker have in common?
“They’ve never won a gold medal for Curling while wearing edible panties?”
“Er, that’s not the answer I had on the card…”
The answer (that my legal team approved) is they’ve all been mad enough to say ‘you’re hired!’ to me in my first year of being a copywriter.
The fact that I was not only able to transition from full-time magician to full-time copywriter when COVIDIUS struck is amazing, but to land gigs with three GIANTS…
… well that’s just nuts.
Thing is, I didn’t land any of these jobs because I was the best writer… cos I ain’t.
I was able to do it by using an inventive and slightly humorous approach that made every single one of them say…
“You gotta see this guy!”
That ^^^ was the key to my approach and, in The Sniper Approach, I lay out exactly what I did, along with screenshots and examples.
If you’re looking to land a dream client or get on someone’s radar, you might want to check out The Sniper Approach.
HOW TO WRITE WORDS THAT ARE CLEAR(LY) YOU – if you had to choose between a video that shows how to make your writing clearer and more compelling or a video that gives you some easy ways to add some personality to your prose…
… which would you go for?
No need to struggle because I’ve got a video that does BOTH!
In 22 minutes, I can show you how to improve your writing AND put a smile on your reader’s face.
Best of all, it comes with a FREE steak knife!
(Actually, I might be confusing it with the Ginsu knife commercial)
Want to write betterer, like wot I duz? This video’s a good thing to click.
FIVE DAYS TO FUNNY – Want to funny up your words, without resorting to hack jokes or tired memes that everyone has seen 1,352 times already?
If so, “Five days to funny” is a good place to start.
Back in 2019, I ran one of those FB 5 Day challenges everyone is doing, teaching folk how to create jokes.
Based on genuine comedy writing techniques, “Five days to funny” is all the useful parts of that challenge, copy and pasted into a nice PDF to make for easier reading.
It’s not a short-cut. You’ll need to follow the process and do some work, but if you can handle that, you’ll have a tried and tested system for coming up with your own gags whenever you need ‘em.
What’s more, these gags and ideas will be unique, so your customers will think you’re a creative genius, like Buddha, Steve Jobs, or Miley Cyrus.
Ever watched Chris Rock on Netflix and wondered, “How the hell does he come up with that?”…
… “Five days to funny” is a tiny peek into that world.
– – –
I know what you’re thinking…
“But John, those are only FOUR of the generous freebies you’ve created for us inside the GOOGLE DRIVE OF AWESOMENESS!!!!…”
Yeah, I know, but I figured that a year’s worth of emails, a guide to better writing, a proven technique for landing dream clients, and a comedian’s guide to creating jokes was enough for you to be getting on with for now…
I’ll talk more about the rest soon.
If you have any questions, hit reply and ask. I’m happy to help.
Have a great weekend,
John